Holding both Darkness and Light

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So here we are, in a time where our culture likes to taunt us with opposites. The darkness of the winter solstice, and the light and joy of the holiday season. I’m sure it’s not on accident that we are asked to be joy-filled during a difficult time of year. The holidays can bring many emotions up for us all, and we get to do that in the dark. So what can that look like for us? I would encourage you to consider that not only can culture ask us to hold both darkness and light, but you can too. Your body, your mind and your spirit have the capacity to feel both emotional darkness and light simultaneously. I’m sure you have felt this at other times of your life, but it feels particularly potent for me right now.

Without darkness we can’t see the light, without light, we can’t get through darkness. Maybe joy and light doesn’t feel accessible to you right now. That’s okay….. what about other aspects of light that you can feel during the holidays? Maybe emotional darkness feels too dark. That’s also okay…… what about other qualities that come out of darkness that you can focus on? Emotional darkness gifts us compassion for suffering, wisdom, gratitude, and patience. Light gifts us not only joy, but meaning, hope, and connection also.

We get to re-write the script for how a holiday is supposed to look with darkness and light, or how it’s supposed to go.

Seek out the other types of dark and light that we can cultivate. Maybe instead of joy, we can choose to seek meaning. Sometimes having a more vulnerable conversation with an important human brings meaning rather than joy, and that’s okay. Instead of joy, we can find deeper connection to others by being vulnerable. Instead of feeling overwhelmed by the darkness, we cultivate deep compassion and kindness for ourselves and others by being curious. Rather than feeling consumed by the dark, we can remind ourselves about what the dark has taught us or how we are grateful. By re-writing the script about how we hold the dark and the light, we can move through this season with more grace and peace.

Humans are amazing, our ability to hold opposite feelings and experiences in our hearts and minds can be a gift. This season, you don’t have to choose or follow the old script.

~Angela